Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Not Weight Related, but related to everything.

Two weekends ago I was in Pittsburgh for a conference and on Saturday morning Jason's mother was taken to the ER. She passed away as I was on my way to the airport to catch an emergency flight home to St. Louis. It was super scary and I felt very helpless. She had kidney failure and the high potassium level stopped her heart.

My fiancé is a twin, and their dad died when they were 2 years old. Their mom raised them & she was only 56. Mom's aren't supposed to die. Especially this young. It hit harder to home because my mom lost her mom at 28 & 50-something. I was always fearful that my mom would die young. And my mom knows all to well the emotions that Jason is feeling.

The hardest part was how happy she was, especially about the upcoming wedding. She had just gotten her dress.

It just sucks. To be so close to a happy day, and now we’re all filled with such sadness. My bridal shower is this Saturday and my mom is trying to figure out a way to honor her. While we were going through Margaret’s things, Jason found a photo album of pictures of him from Birth to Senior in High School. It’s actually my Bridal Shower present from his mom. Jason's sister-in-law received one at her bridal shower. I'm glad she was able to complete it.
I didn't post this for condolences, mostly just to talk about it. And remind everyone how short our lives could wind up being. I haven't been online almost at all this past week because well, it doesn't matter. The things that truly matter are not a keyboard or computer screen, but the person sitting next to you.

About 99% of my wedding planning is complete so I'm fortunate that I don't have to worry about things.

I'm going to concentrate on the real life things. The diet is kinda ok. I haven't gained weight from the emotional eating I've been doing, and I need to get back to the gym and on the treadmill. In another couple days I'll be back on track. I'm slowly easing back into now.

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